Why am I a broken Christian?

Was reading a blog the other day where the poster was commenting that he felt like a broken Christian. The following was my response to that post:

I was raised in Church, and also have been part of ministries that are still going strong for the Lord today. These ministries have one goal and that is the spreading of the Good News of the Gospel of Christ - not judging. To make this post more to the point, that is our goal; to spread that news just as Paul did (and instructed) to the churches and in his letters. People are going to come to know the Lord if they have only been under the Truth (the Word). Faith comes by hearing. What people do with that truth we really have no bearing - just as we can't create anything with just speech as God did in the beginning times. It's a freewill choice. Sometimes I think that churches today mask evangelism as really judging people (blanket statement I know but the church is failing somehow by not showing the Love of Christ in their out reach).

I don't know where I lost it (joy), but I read in Psalms 51:12 where the writer was asking God to restore the joy of HIS salvation. Well, the only way that I know to loose the joy of God's salvation is by my sin. I am eternally secure, but my relationship with God is broken when I sin. So, what am I saying, I'm broken because of my sin? I read that God does break down His children to build them back in the way He has planed for us ... all I can say to that is God, build away! Happiness is a feeling that is as fleeting as the wind. Joy is something that I have when I'm in the presence of God.

The presence of God's joy should come through corporate worship. Unfortunately, many times worship services are anything but a joyful experience. I realize that God reveals Himself to us in worship in a variety of ways. Nevertheless, the only thing I can find to describe His revealed presence in worship is joy according to Psalm 16:11.

I pray that God will show me the path of life He has for me. And in that path the Bible promises me/us that in that presence is the fullness of joy and at His right hand (Heaven? or earth? I'm thinking Heaven as that is where His right hand is ...) are pleasures for evermore.

Thanks for reading,
Jamey

The following was left in the comments of the other blog site: (emphasis mine)

I think what you’re tired of (in responce to being tired of being broken) is what all Christians who really stress relationship over legalism desires; being real. We (as Christians) strive to look above reproach so much, that we seldom focus on what God is really showing us about ourselves that’s keeping us from getting closer to Him, so while we’re stressing 8 ways to this, 12 keys to that & 20 steps to prosperity, none of those things really center around Jesus Christ & that is where the real fatigue sets in. As far as not being broken, I don’t think that it’s a bad thing to be broken (based on Mark 4), but I think that the joy should be in the gift of eternal life that we receive by accepting Jesus as our Lord and Savior, as well knowing that these light afflictions don’t compare to eternity spent with God. Living life in light of eternity instead of basing it on these clown hucksters that peddle the gospel for attention and/or profit financially.